Taking Sips Until I Can Get a Full Drink
A practical lesson in self-care.
Late last year, Michael, Jeffrey, and I stayed in an Earthship home in Black Forest. Completely self-sustaining, filled with plants, and remote enough to help us disconnect. We moved slowly, ate good food, and sat outside on the swing by a fire. We napped and watched movies. It was just what we needed.
During our time there, while Michael was taking a nap one afternoon I sat down to casually plan out a workshop I was offering later that month. Something clicked and it flowed beautifully. Within a few hours, it was almost completely done. It was beautiful, intuitive, and inspired. “This is the energy I want to create everything with,” I told Michael. That creation, and that stay away at the Earthship was a big, full, glass of fresh water to quench my creative thirst.
Since that stay, I have longed to return, and of course, it’s almost always fully booked. I keep getting all these ideas of things I’d like to create, immediately followed by the thought that I have to escape away and construct the perfect conditions in order to create them. So they just don’t happen.
Recently while talking to a client, I also accidentally talked to myself (because that’s how therapy actually works) and I said “It doesn’t sound like this season you’re in is going to allow you to have a big gulp of rest, so we need to find the sips until you can get a gulp” and then she and I started sifting through her day to day and identifying little sips of rest she could take until she could get a longer break. We talked about adding some mindful “sips” of love, creativity, romance, or compassion into her daily routines. This could also be called “habit stacking” by some, but I don’t think that term is juicy enough for me.
This idea has lingered with me, that sips can sustain us until we can get to a larger water source. And truly, who, if thirsty and offered a sip, would say “No, I’ll wait indefinitely until I can have the full drink?” We are programmed to believe this “all or nothing” notion that the circumstances must be perfect, easy, and available, instead of getting scrappy about our self-care and collecting sips and moments here and there - because they really do add up.
To this end, I am working on finding sips. Sips of creativity, and sips of rest. Sips of play and self-compassion. When things are hard, I look for sips of hope. Here are some ideas I have found.
Gently massage on my SPF in the morning as a little “thank you” for the way my face expresses my emotions for me.
Extend some heartfelt gratitude for the coffee in my cup and be a little dramatic and moody as I clutch it and stare through the window at the snow.
Consider 2 minutes of self-Reiki as better than no Reiki at all.
Take some good centering breaths at the end of my lunch break before I jump back in with clients.
Write down the ideas of things I want to create, even if I can’t make them happen right now.
Take an extra minute snuggling Jeff in the morning before I get going.
Let the sunlight shine on my face through my office window for a few seconds before I write my session note.
Fantasize about the next trip I’d like to take, even if it won’t be planned for a while.
Play one of my favorite songs by Brandi Carlile as many times as I want on my commute home, and sing loudly even though I am truly and honestly and heartbreakingly tone-deaf.
Stretch to my toes and let out a big sigh, even if I can’t get a full yoga practice in.
Read a paragraph in the book I’m loving when I don’t have time for a whole chapter.
Massage my scalp with a little extra love while I shampoo.
Light a candle while I get ready for bed.
Put some music on while I make breakfast, or save my favorite podcast for my commute, when I can attentively listen.
Rub a little essential oil under my nose and take some deep breaths.
Gently put a hand on my heart and tune into the rhythm of life beating in me.
I’d love to hear from you. What are some self-care sips you take? Where could you stack in some extra sips through your day?
By the way, it sure means a lot to me that you’ve chosen to come along with me and read what I’m sharing here. I’m truly, deeply, and sincerely grateful.
Wholeheartedly,
Jesie