Do you know that place?
The darkest dark?
Shattered, fractured, every piece of you pulled apart. You’re transparent there. We’re all transparent there.
Our pieces all hovering in proximity, but never touching each other the same again.
In this fractured and undone state, I am whole. Perhaps more awake than I’ve ever been. All at once disconnected from anything, everything.
Untethered and uncovered, yet fully whole. I become nothing and everything, all at once. In concert, I cease to exist and am connected to everything that ever has existed.
My pain breaks me, and my surrender frees me.
This is grief. This is loss. This is me. This is it. I am grief. I am hope. I am healing…
and there is nothing to fix.
So I stay fractured, letting the light fill the cracks that are only relevant because of the darkness. I befriend the darkness. I befriend this place.
“Slow down. Don’t get up too fast or you could hurt yourself” I whisper to me. “Don’t rush, I’m right here.”
This place will transform us into soft creatures if we let it.
Right here is where I’ll stay, examining every piece of me. Examining the pieces with curiosity and love. Touching the edges with a gentle finger. Sliding my hands and my hope all around the perimeter, feeling for sharp snags to serve as anchors for this repair.
This is slow work. This is soul work.
This. is. slow. work.
This. is. soul. work.